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第24章 微笑的力量 1（第1页）

hePowerofSmile

戴尔·卡耐基

DaleCarnegie

戴尔·卡耐基（1888—1955），美国著名的心理学家和人际关系学家。卡耐基开创的“人际关系训练班”遍布世界各地。他以超人的智慧、严谨的思维，在道德、精神和行为准则上指导万千读者，给予人们安慰、鼓舞，使读者从中汲取力量，从而生活，开创崭新的人生。早期著作《人性的光辉》《语言的突破》《美好的人生》《人性的优点》曾被译成28种文字，其中《人性的弱点》一书，是继《圣经》之后世界出版史上第二畅销书！

AceintheHole

Understandthesenewwordsbeforeyoureadthisarticle。

1。grouchn。不高兴的人

2。eliminatev。清除

3。miserableadj。痛苦的

Youmusthaveagoodtimemeetingeoleifyouexectthemtohaveagoodtimemeetingyou。

Ihaveaskedthousandsofbusinesseoletosmileatsomeoneeveryhourofthedayforaweekandthencometoclassandtalkabouttheresults。Howdiditwork？Let’ssee。。。HereisaletterfromWilliamB。Steinhardt，aNewYorkstockbroker。Hiscaseisntisolated。Infact，itistyicalofhundredsofcases。

“Ihavebeenmarriedforovereighteenyears，”wroteMr。Steinhardt，“andinallthattimeIseldomsmiledatmywifeorsoketwodozenwordstoherfromthetimeIgotuuntilIwasreadytoleaveforbusiness。IwasoneoftheworstgroucheswhoeverwalkeddownBroadway。

“Whenyouaskedmetomakeatalkaboutmyexeriencewithsmiles，IthoughtIwouldtryitforaweek。Sothenextmorning，whilecombingmyhair，Ilookedatmyglummuginthemirrorandsaidtomyself，‘Bill，youaregoingtowiethescowloffthatsourussofyourstoday。Youaregoingtosmile。Andyouaregoingtobeginrightnow。’AsIsatdowntobreakfast，Igreetedmywifewitha‘Goodmorning，mydear’，andsmiledasIsaidit。”

“Youwarnedmethatshemightbesurrised。Well，youunderestimatedherreaction。Shewasbewildered。Shewasshocked。Itoldherthatinthefutureshecouldexectthisasaregularoccurrence，andIketitueverymorning。”

“ThischangedattitudeofminebroughtmorehainessintoourhomeinthetwomonthssinceIstartedthantherewasduringthelastyear。”

“AsIleaveformyoffice，Igreettheelevatoroeratorintheaartmenthousewitha‘Goodmorning’andasmile；Igreetthedoormanwithasmile。IsmileatthecashierinthesubwayboothwhenIaskforchange。AsIstandontheflooroftheStockExchange，Ismileateolewhountilrecentlyneversawmesmile。”

“Isoonfoundthateverybodywassmilingbackatme，Itreatthosewhocometomewithcomlaintsorgrievancesinacheerfulmanner，IsmileasIlistentothemandIfindthatadjustmentsareaccomlishedmucheasier。Ifindthatsmilesarebringingmedollars，manydollarseveryday。”

“Isharemyofficewithanotherbroker。Oneofhisclerksisalikableyoungcha，andIwassoelatedabouttheresultsIwasgettingthatItoldhimrecentlyaboutmynewhilosohyofhumanrelations。HethenconfessedthatwhenIfirstcametosharemyofficewithhisfirmhethoughtmeaterriblegrouch—andonlyrecentlychangedhismind。HesaidIwasreallyhumanwhenIsmiled。”

“Ihavealsoeliminatedcriticismfrommysystem。Igiveareciationandraisenowinsteadofcondemnation。IhavestoedtalkingaboutwhatIwant。Iamnowtryingtoseetheothererson’sviewoint。Andthesethingshaveliterallyrevolutionizedmylife。Iamatotallydifferentman，ahaierman，aricherman，richerinfriendshisandhainess—theonlythingsthatmattermuchafterall。”

Youdon’tfeellikesmiling？Thenwhat？Twothings。First，forceyourselftosmile。Ifyouarealone，forceyourselftowhistleorhumatuneorsing。Actasifyouwerealreadyhay，andthatwilltendtomakeyouhay。HereisthewaythesychologistandhilosoherWilliamJamesutit：

Actionseemstofollowfeeling，butreallyactionandfeelinggotogether；andbyregulatingtheaction，whichisunderthemoredirectcontrolofthewill，wecanindirectlyregulatethefeeling，whichisnot。

Thusthesovereignvoluntaryathtocheerfulness，ifourcheerfulnessbelost，istositucheerfullyandtoactandseakasifcheerfulnesswerealreadythere…

Everybodyintheworldisseekinghainess—andthereisonesurewaytofindit。Thatisbycontrollingyourthoughts。Hainessdoesn’tdeendonoutwardconditions。Itdeendsoninnerconditions。

Itisn’twhatyouhaveorwhoyouareorwhereyouareorwhatyouaredoingthatmakesyouhayorunhay。Itiswhatyouthinkaboutit。Forexamle，twoeolemaybeinthesamelace，doingthesamething；bothmayhaveaboutanequalamountofmoneyandrestige—andyetonemaybemiserableandtheotherhay。Why？Becauseofadifferentmentalattitude。IhaveseenjustasmanyhayfacesamongtheooreasantstoilingwiththeirrimitivetoolsinthedevastatingheatofthetroicsasIhaveseeninair-conditionedofficesinNewYork，ChicagoorLosAngeles。

“Thereisnothingeithergoodorbad，”saidShakeseare，“butthinkingmakesitso。”

AbeLincolnonceremarkedthat“mostfolksareaboutashayastheymakeutheirmindstobe”。Hewasright。

Wheneveryougoout-of-doors，drawthechinin，carrythecrownoftheheadhigh，andfillthelungstotheutmost；drinkinthesunshine；greetyourfriendswithasmile，andutsoulintoeveryhandclas。Donotfearbeingmisunderstoodanddonotwasteaminutethinkingaboutyourenemies。