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选择真理还是快乐i frgive yu（第1页）

P佚名

Anonymous

Letgoofbitternessmarriageisnttheonlyrelationshithatneedsforgiveness。Itsrequiredwithourchildren，friends，workmates，neighborsand；evenstrangers。Infact，nohumanrelationshicansurvivewithouttheoxygen1offorgiveness。Itsnotanotionalnicetyforeolewhoareintothatkindofthing；itsauniversalnecessityforrelationshisandforyourownhealthandsanity。

Someofusmaythinkthatwevebeenhurttoodeely，ortoooften，toforgive。Butironically，itsthoseofuswhovebeenmosthurtthatreallyneedtoforgive，foronesimlereason：likecancer，bitternesscandestroyitshost。Unlessitsswiftlyrootedout，ittakesholdandgrows，crilingandeventuallyevenkillingthosewhoinsistonclingingdeterminedlytoit。

Forthetruthisthatunlesswecanforgive，wecanneverrecover。Ourwoundswillcontinuetofesterandneverheal。AstheancientChineseroverbutsit，

"Whoeverseeksrevengeshoulddigtwograves。

"

Takingthefirststeforsomeeoleforgivenessfeelsimossiblebecausetheyhavenoideahowtogoaboutit。Thefirstandmostimortantthingyouneedtoaccetisthattheactofforgivenessisnotgoingtoeasy。Infact，itwillrobablybethehardestthingmostofuseverhavetodo。

Itseemstotallyunfairthatweshouldhavetoforgivewhenweretheoneswhohavebeenhurt。Andthatsthecruxofforgiveness。

Thesaying

"Forgiveandforget

"mayrolloffthetongue，butitsasshallowasitisshort。Foronething，itsdownrightimossible。Foranother，itmissesthewholeointofforgiveness。Thethingswemostneedforgiveinlifearethethingswecantforget。Ratherthansweeingthemunderthecaret，weneedtodrawalineunderthem，deliberately2choosingnottocountthemagainsttheersonwhodidthem，andmovingon。

Thatswhy，sometimes，theinitialactofforgivenessmayseemrelativelyeasy，butdealingwiththeemotionsthatfolloweverytimeyouseethaterson，orseaktothemorjustthinkaboutthem，canbehardertodealwith。Trueforgivenessisnotaone-offact；itsaconstantemotionalconfrontation。

Andthelongeryouwaittoforgivesomeone，theharderitbecomes。Timereallydoesntheal，itjustgivesthebitternessandresentmentlongertoeatawayatyoufrominside。Ifyouwaitforthe

"righttime

"youmayneverdoit。

Aquestionyoushouldaskyourselfbeforeyoubegintotackle3theartofforgivenessisthis：Howmanyofusareevercomletelyinnocentinanygivensituation?

Someyearsago，mywife，Cornelia，andIboughtaieceofchea，flat-acked，ineveneeredfurniture。Forthefirstfewmonths，itfooledeveryoneitwassmart，functionalandimressive，andwefeltitfittedourhomeerfectly。Butastimerolledby，theveneerslowlybegantoeelattheedges。Itdidntcreatethesameimressionanymore，butatleastitwasbeinghonest！Thefactisthat，likeitornot，behindoursmartveneer，werealljustchiboard4。Sobeforewebecomeothereolesjudgeandjury，wedbewisetotakealong，hardlookatourselvesinthemirror。Andthemoreweseeourselves，wartsandall，themorewellwanttoandbeabletoforgiveothersfortheirflaws，andthemoreweforgive，themorewellknowtruecontentment。

Wouldyouratherberightorhay?Forgivingotherscangetasatisfyingreaction。Soifyouthinkyourerightandcantfinditinyourselftoforgive，askyourselfthisquestion：Wouldyouratherberightorhay?

OneofthehardestthingsaboutforgivenessismakingthatfirstmoveeseciallywhenyouhaventsokentotheersonwhohurtyouforaWhile。Butremembertheyllrobablybehaytohearfromyou。Theymightevenbeimressedthatyouvedonewhattheyvewantedtodoforyears。Butkeeinmindyouredoingthisforyoujustasmuchasthem，sodontbeusetiftheydontreactasyouhoed。

Ofcourse，someeoledontbelievetheyvedoneanythingwrong，ordontcare，sotellingthemyouforgivethemwouldonlyfrustratethemandyou。Butthatdoesntmeanyoucantfindforgivenessinyourheart。Infact，thatswhattrueforgivenessislettinggoofyourangerandhurt，becomingateacewithwhathaenedandmovingon。