Intermediate Arts examination; and there came a lull in her
eager activities。 She slackened off; she relaxed altogether。
Worn nervous and inflammable by the excitement of the
preparation for the examination; and by the sort of exaltation
which carried her through the crisis itself; she now fell into a
quivering passivity; her will all loosened。
The family went to Scarborough for a month。 Gudrun and the
father were busy at the handicraft holiday school there; Ursula
was left a good deal with the children。 But when she could; she
went off by herself。
She stood and looked out over the shining sea。 It was very
beautiful to her。 The tears rose hot in her heart。
Out of the far; far space there drifted slowly in to her a
passionate; unborn yearning。 〃There are so many dawns that have
not yet risen。〃 It seemed as if; from over the edge of the sea;
all the unrisen dawns were appealing to her; all her unborn soul
was crying for the unrisen dawns。
As she sat looking out at the tender sea; with its lovely;
swift glimmer; the sob rose in her breast; till she caught her
lip suddenly under her teeth; and the tears were forcing
themselves from her。 And in her very sob; she laughed。 Why did
she cry? She did not want to cry。 It was so beautiful that she
laughed。 It was so beautiful that she cried。
She glanced apprehensively round; hoping no one would see her
in this state。
Then came a time when the sea was rough。 She watched the
water travelling in to the coast; she watched a big wave running
unnoticed; to burst in a shock of foam against a rock;
enveloping all in a great white beauty; to pour away again;
leaving the rock emerged black and teeming。 Oh; and if; when the
wave burst into whiteness; it were only set free!
Sometimes she loitered along the harbour; looking at the
sea…browned sailors; who; in their close blue jerseys; lounged
on the harbour…wall; and laughed at her with impudent;
municative eyes。
There was established a little relation between her and them。
She never would speak to them or know any more of them。 Yet as
she walked by and they leaned on the sea…wall; there was
something between her and them; something keen and delightful
and painful。 She liked best the young one whose fair; salty hair